Can an Average Runner Become an IRONMAN?

Audaciously...I'm thinking, "YES!"

I haven’t been completely forthcoming…

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I haven’t been completely forthcoming with you, or with myself.

grief supportGrief continues to affect me. I don’t like admitting this and I certainly don’t enjoy this being my reality when it’s been over a year since my Dad passed on. Yet here it is. And, I feel like the big thing for me to learn through this whole process is to fully admit, accept and process the challenges that life presents. It’s been to my detriment that I’ve done my coach thing and continued to tell myself that “all is good,” “it’s not a big deal in the scheme of things,” etc. I know that these statements ARE true, yet using these to cover up and not fully process what saddens, frustrates and disappoints me is ultimately not helpful.

After Dad passed, I believe I started to actually process the 15 years of disappointment and anger that my the last decade and a half of my Dad’s life were riddled with confusing, scary, vulnerable and degrading health issues. I finally started to fully process that I was upset and mad that my Dad’s life had looked like that for so long, that my Mom’s life looked like that, that we all faced those heartaches and worry. My Dad was amazing and had the unbelievable ability to appreciate life, get the most out of his circumstances and to stay strong with his faith. He made it easy for us to feel OK and keep moving forward.

I miss him. I miss him very much.

I know he’s with me always. Yet, I’m also a tangible, tactical gal so it’s tough to not be able to see, touch and hear him.

This process of grief is the most confusing and humbling experience I’ve ever had. At times, I feel embarrassed and ashamed that my grief continues to affect me the way it does. Like on Thursday, when I went back to bed after dropping the kids off at school and slept till Noon. I continue to have these days from time to time. I sometimes don’t know whether to attribute the tired and dimmed attitude to triathlon training, to a full schedule, to grief or to a combination of the above. Being on a couple of new journeys at once makes it hard to decipher. It’s probably not even important to decipher. I think that’s also part of what there is for me to learn. It’s not something that needs to be figured out. Just experience, be compassionate with myself and those around me, don’t project worries into the future (like if I’m this tired today, how tired will I be when my training volume doubles!!?), breathe, process and stay in the present.

Total Immersion!

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I am going to be chill about “the swim” for a while… I promise!

That’s a BIG, bold statement for me. (If you’ve read any of the last half a dozen or so blog entries out here, you probably recognize this!)

Here’s why I’m going to be CHILL…

total immersion2 happenings came together synchronistically to put me on a new swimming path…

1) – Kevin Munday (helpful triathlete and repeat IM distance finisher) recommended the book, Total Immersion, to me on Facebook in response to a “celebrating running and lamenting about swimming” post. I fired up the book on my Kindle that very night and started reading. I immediately liked and believed in what I was absorbing.

2) – Two days later I attended a swim clinic from Blue Dolphin Swim that was offered as a free trial to Chicago Tri Club members. (Being a Chicago Tri Club member is awesomely helpful!) The instructor was Total Immersion (TI) trained, and the movements he taught us made great sense to me. After the clinic I had a swim session to do. I went to my gym’s pool, and I tried “feeling out” some of the key concepts and skills shared in the book and the clinic (stretch out with each stroke because longer moves through the water smoother and faster; and rock some from side to side to be a more aerodynamic vessel rather than a barge moving flat along the surface and having to displace so much more water), and these concepts felt good! So much better. I was much calmer. I wasn’t panickingly anticipating my next opportunity to breathe. I lost count of my laps because I was lost – from time to time – in the flow of the swim.

My own personal miracle!!

Now not everything is now perfect – far from it. The timing of my stroke/breath when I breathe is jacked up. It doesn’t flow quite right, and I lose my balance and dip down in the water and bob back up as I breathe. There are also issues with the second half of my arm stroke. I’m sure I’m not bending my elbow and catching and pulling quite right. Yet, I can feel it! And what does feel right, really feels right and is having me enjoy swimming much more!

I’m now going to take an 8-week class from Blue Dolphin to get all these TI swim stroke basics down. The class runs from Feb. 22 through Apr. 11. I’m looking forward to this and trusting this.

I’m chill. I’m chill! Phew…

I’m not ready for Masters Swim Classes, I’ve decided. Not yet. Not now.

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emotional roller coasterComing off my sick week, I first majorly improved my relationship with the swim and then I was again plagued by doubt and then brought myself to back to a (little bit shaky) calm.

Phew. I’m tired of hearing myself lament and go on and on about swimming. Aren’t you??

But, I’m committed to processing this fully (and hopefully healthily) – so here’s how this week’s swimming emotional roller coaster ride went…

After my last swim lesson and discussion with my instructor, I was committed to writing specific drills for my warm up and cool down. This way I would get to mix them up a bit, still make sure I completed a good variety, AND not get bored with the same ‘ole routine all the time.

Then for the prescribed “main workout,” I am to set a goal for each of them, a goal that will challenge me and keep me progressing.

OK! I can do all that. I was jazzed about it. I entered all the drills and goals in my phone. I varied up the drills and felt I had a good variety. I set goals. Primarily, for long swims, I set a goal of doing 25% of them (each 4th length of the pool) bilateral. For short swims, 100 repeats, I set a goal of doing 50% bi.

I started off the week – a week with 4 swim sessions Monday through Thursday! – looking forward to executing my swim plan. I felt the goals were challenging, yet doable. I was happy. I’d found an approach to reduce the monotony and pressure of always doing the same routine in the same or faster times. These plans were engaging my mind and my desire in new ways. I was enjoying swim sessions!! My own personal miracle.

Then I talked to a couple of people. People who are swimmers – and one who’s an Ironman Wisconsin finisher – so they know what they’re talking about. Everyone (all 2 of them) were talking about how I need to get to Masters classes and how the classes would push me in ways that I never could alone. Agreed. It got me thinking. My swim speed is super slow. I need that to improve. Should I start attending Masters classes to achieve that improvement? Right now?! I felt the pressure to get to Masters, and I already felt the stress of being the one person in the class who couldn’t keep up. I could immediately feel that breathless panicky sensation that makes me want to kick and stroke frantically to get to the other side of the pool. I was worked up. I felt I should get to Masters classes. I felt terrified to go.

Then…I talked to myself! What was I doing? I had been happy and calm and excited about swimming at the beginning of the week, and now I had let myself get worked up into a frenzy. Could I go back? I decided I could and should. I had just this week moved into the next phase of routines and goals that felt good. I felt like I was challenging myself in a good way. And, most importantly, my approach had had me enjoying swimming more than I had in a while. I thought I should go back. Furthermore, as I reflected calmly on my journey, I decided that it would be best to wait a while before going to Masters classes. I don’t want to push myself to go faster and lose what precious gains I’ve made in form. And, I don’t want to go there with a low skill level, struggle, and cause myself to panic and like swimming less.

It’s not time yet. I’m not going to Masters class any time soon. And that’s that.

Why Swimming is Better Than Running

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happy swimmerOkay, as promised when I created the “Why Running is Better Than Swimming” blog, here’s the “Why Swimming is Better Than Running” list.

I won’t lie. I struggled with this one more than I did the other one. Don’t get me wrong, I see huge benefits to adding in swimming to my workout routine. I’m even thinking that when I’m done with this Ironman race, I’ll still continue to keep swimming as part of my repertoire.

There are times when I can feel the relaxing nature of the water moving over my arms. In fact, that’s what I tell myself to focus on when I’m getting overly worked up and stressed out in the water. Which, I have to admit is much more often than I like to admit.

There are times…

…I don’t want to do the drills because I feel that I especially struggle with controlled breathing during the drills.

…I don’t want to free style swim because I know I should be pushing myself to swim all bilateral and take shorter breaks on the one end of the pool (I have stopped taking breaks on at least one side of the pool!), and that’s uncomfortable and makes me nervous.

…I don’t want to do the kick drills because I’m worried I’m not quite doing them right.

Okay, enough! This is a list about why swimming is better than running. Let’s get to it!

  • When you get up to go to the gym to swim, no need to wash your face.
  • No post workout cool down time needed (at least not for me, at my level!)
  • Easier on body joints.
  • No concern about over heating (again, at least not at my level!).
  • You get a lane in the pool and it’s all yours.
  • You use more muscle groups.
  • Swimming enables you to be deeply in tune with your body (my mind is moving from body part to body part trying to make sure all the appendages are doing what they’re supposed to!)

Swimmers, I’m sorry! I know there’s more. What else do you have to add? What makes swimming your sport of choice?

And, I gotta admit I thought of more things for the “Why Running is Better Than Swimming” list when I was putting together this list… For example. swimming is really destroying my finger nails…